on board
While there isn’t always both a “spender and a saver” in a relationship, there’s no doubt that two partners are never going to be perfectly aligned on the spending/saving continuum. And, even if they were they were perfectly aligned, they would have disagreements with what to spend on!
Both partners need to agree on the major points of the financial plan and be willing to do their part to make sure the plan is followed. At a minimum, there should be general agreement with how the money is earned, saved, invested, spent, and given.
Too often, when trying to get their partner on board, people focus on the mechanics — how to budget, how to invest, etc. In reality, the place to focus is on the goals. Until someone understands “the why” of personal finance, they will not have the motivation necessary to plan and follow the plan.
If your partner feels deprived without a $2M house and a $100K car and a $10K trip every month, that’s just not realistic/compatible with a physician’s income. This view of normal needs to be corrected or the partnership is not going to be successful. However, in most situations, there’s enough wiggle room to reach financial goals without anyone feeling particularly put out.
A really nice side effect of this switch has been that we simply spend less money overall. The simple act of measuring causes a behavioral change. In science, this is known as the observer effect or Pearson’s Law.
If you want to limit the cost, use an advisor in a more limited way–to help you draft up an initial financial plan and periodic check-ups. But you are far better off paying a good financial advisor than not doing financial planning at all.
Another great method of bringing your spouse up to speed with financial literacy is to take the WCI Fire Your Financial Advisor online course together. Despite its provocative name, the first unit of the course will teach you how to select and work with an advisor who gives good advice at a fair price.
St. Peter said that “Love covers a multitude of sins.” When it comes to personal finance, a physician income covers a multitude of mistakes. Look at all the mistakes your peers have made! And they’ve still become multi-millionaires!