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The Optimization Trap: When Dollars Don’t Equal Happiness
We obsess over optimizing our finances—maximizing returns, minimizing expenses, plotting the perfect retirement date. But what if we’re optimizing for the wrong things?
The Hidden Cost of Financial Decisions
In a 2021 survey of Americans who had recently moved, about 1/3 reported some regret over the decision, with the most common regret being leaving friends and family.
How many physicians have taken high-paying jobs in new locations only to find themselves deeply unhappy without their support networks, friends, and family? The extra income looks impressive on paper, but spreadsheets don’t bring chicken soup when you’re sick or remember your birthday.
The Geographic Arbitrage Myth
“Move to Rural Nowheresville! Housing costs 70% less! Retire a decade early!”
Sounds perfect until Friday night arrives and everyone you love is hundreds of miles away. How many people have sold their homes to save money but realize that without their friends and families they don’t feel at home?
I’ve watched colleagues chase lucrative positions across the country only to return years later, financially richer but emotionally depleted. I moved to Arizona from Florida after I sold my hospitalist group. Arizona seemed a better place to live on paper. Despite the impressive compensation package, I did not feel connected to the community, and we had no family there to ground us. We moved back to Florida and saw a marked improvement in our quality of life. I reconnected with my friends here, and we continue to reap those rewards daily—rewards no spreadsheet can quantify.
The Proximity Premium
Here’s my radical financial advice: Proximity to people you love is worth more than any job will ever pay you.
That “inefficient” decision to live near family means:
- Free childcare from grandparents (if they are willing)
- Friends who understand the unique stresses of medicine and offer perspectives no therapist can bill for
- A support network when life inevitably throws curveballs
These are assets no financial planner includes in their calculations.
Redefining Optimization
I’m not suggesting abandoning financial prudence. Rather, consider social capital alongside financial capital. Sometimes the “suboptimal” financial choice yields the highest returns in overall life satisfaction.
Your financial calculator can’t compute the value of a friend who shows up unannounced with coffee after your night shift. Your retirement projections don’t account for the peace of mind when your sister lives close enough to check on your aging parents. The wealthiest physician I know isn’t the one with the biggest portfolio—it’s the one whose retirement party had standing room only. When plotting your financial future, remember: The best investment strategy might just be buying the house down the street from the people who make your life worth living.
After all, what’s the point of being the richest doctor in a town where nobody knows your name?
Jorge Sanchez, MD
Naples, Florida
The Sunday Best 05/18/2025
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In case you missed it:
The Unretired: Why Some Doctors Come Back (and What It Costs Them)
